It has been a while. Just after you wrote this, I got on the wrong bus. For me, everything applies except #3. Unfortunately, my bus isn’t stopping for at least a few months. #1 is a powerful motivator when you have a family to support. I’m finishing my last 2 classes for my degree this week, so there is light at the end of the tunnel. I can feel the urge to get back to my writing, so maybe the bus will at least slow down and I can do a little tuck and roll into the grass along side the highway! It’s great to see how awesome Mildly Creative is looking. Keep up the great work.

I’m glad to hear that you followed your heart rather than a paycheck. Money’s important; we have to have it, but we don’t always need more of it.

I became introduced to your blog through the Barbara Sher board, so it was good to see her mentioned in your comments. Like the others before me, I have been on some pretty wrong buses, the longest ones for 9 years and 15 years. It’s funny how the best busses I ever got on were the ones right out of college – when I wasn’t jaded with the crap that goes on in working environments. When I left a bus about 5 years ago to retire, I told my son “That job sucked my soul.” Recently I was offered a job to return to work, and today I made the call and said I didn’t want to get on that bus. I feel so good now. I was struggling with the decision to take the job for about a month! Like you said, the reason it took me so long to make the decision was – you guessed it – the money. I’d rather daydream, write, socialize with friends, belong to a couple of community groups, and do my crafts. I’m so glad I found your blog! You write about the most interesting, and I must say, the most important things that people would like to read about. Thanks.

http://www.illuminatedmind.net/2009/07/21/the-death-of-becoming-something/

Thanks,
Mo

Wow. Wish I would have read this a few years ago (like 15 to be exact). This is great stuff. I just found your blog yesterday through chance (or destiny) thanks to another blog I stumbled upon this week (Jonathan Mead’s article linked to your blog http://www.illuminatedmind.net/2009/07/21/the-death-of-becoming-something/). So I read your series on being authentic first and found it very useful. Some stuff I’ve already discovered but most of it was eye-opening! Thanks!

Now on to this topic. I’ve been on so many wrong buses most of my life. They were not all wrong though!!! I was fortunate to get on the right bus twice by accident when I was a teenager – and they changed my life in such a positive way. It is so important to find that right bus. Life is so much more bearable and actually enjoyable when you do it! (I’m laughing now because 2 out of how many??? Wow! And I am fortunate – some never get on a right bus! Ever.) Unfortunately I got on some really long distance wrong buses about 15 years ago. I realized this 5 years ago and managed to get off a couple of them recently – and I feel better because of it. I’ve only got 1 really bad one left – well that I know of anyway. That would be the one that has been sucking the life out of me more than anything I have ever experienced – my job. Funny thing is I have a very high-profile technical job in my company and am on the best projects, etc. People would give an arm to be where I am – and I am good at it. Too bad my heart is not in it I’d be even better!! Gawd! It means little to me though except it pays my bills. So my main goal in life right now is to GET OFF this bus and get on the right one.

As you say though getting off the wrong bus, especially one that houses, clothes, entertains and feeds 5 (3 teens plus a dog!!) is not something that you can always just stop on a dime and jump off. My wife, God bless her, tried to get me to jump off this bus several times and try to get on another one in the same vein. You know, switch companies. But what is the use of getting off a bus in one lane and getting on another one in the next lane that is really going the same direction. It may be painted different, the seats may be more comfortable or less – who knows. In the end it is not worth it for me – I’d still be heading down the same wrong road. I need a full change of direction and that takes time so I decided to stay with the devil I know for now.

The good news is that I think I have finally found the new bus I will be taking! It started innocently 3 years ago by finally realizing I need to follow some of my life dreams before it is too late – all part of me becoming “me” and not what I think I should be. So I dusted my main dream off and did something serious about following it for the first time ever. That led me from one thing to another and now I believe I can follow that dream but it can also possibly branch out into other things related to that dream (which I never thought of before) that could likely get me off this bus and get me on the right track!!!

The only problem now is me – my crazy fears that are so real now and that I will surely shake my head at once I conquer them. Being in the doldrums so much the past several years I have lost a lot of confidence in “me” so it is hard to believe I can do this – that I can be free. That’s damned scary. Then there is the fear of the unknown. Fear of losing the thin safety net I have with this job and falling on my face and losing everything I have and even worse everything my kids have. However … it shall happen. It may take me longer than I want to but it will come!!!

Wow – I did not plan to ramble so much – pretty disjointed too I think LOL I hope it’s not too much!! This topic is close to my heart so I needed to vent a bit. The good news is that I am working away at this fear. Slowly mind you but I will conquer this. I have conquered other fears too so it can be done! I believe your writings will help too so I subscribed to you blog! And I just though of it – but the thing you said about buying into your own dreams before expecting others to buy into them? Wow – exactly where I am at. Time to put some teeth into this new dream which could possibly set me and my family free.

Thanks again for getting off your bus!!! You are helping others do the same!! That’s the next dream for me too!!!

Regards,
Mo