Comments on: 7 Not So Dirty Little Secrets About Confidence

By: Liz

Liz — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 19:52:17 +0000

What a lovely description of confidence! Thanks for this. I’m thinking about how we offer this understanding of confidence to our children and lead them in this direction. The key here seems to be that confidence is built (based on some genuine accomplishment or achievement that comes from sustained practice.). And then from there the transferring of confidence from one domain to another.

By: Deb Owen

Deb Owen — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 17:20:45 +0000

Confidence has little to do with being extroverted or introverted. True. Extroverts often get noticed first. But if they’re exuding the types of characteristics Ken is talking about, they tend to turn most people off.

Authentic confidence versus arrogance masking insecurities eventually shines through and, over the long term, wins the day.

All the best!
deb

By: Nadira Jamal

Nadira Jamal — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 16:27:11 +0000

“Do you think you can fake it to make it? You hear it a lot, and for awhile you can.

But to really gain confidence, you’ll need to do something tangible. You’ll have to show up and write, paint, stretch, plan, and execute.”

I think a lot of people misunderstand “fake it ’till you make it”. It doesn’t mean that you should just pretend to be someone else like wearing a mask. It means that you should *behave* as if you were the person you want to become. It’s the behavior, not the image that will turn you into that person.

By: Cecilia Bax

Cecilia Bax — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 15:12:15 +0000

Points well taken.

By: nicole

nicole — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 14:44:39 +0000

Ooh I like this one Ken.

Confident is also not caring what people think. Or at least recognizing that you do and doing what you want anyway.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 14:43:40 +0000

Ah, what a warm and delicious description of confidence! I tend toward some of these things, but have convinced myself that I was NOT confident because of the loud and attention stealing people I have surrounded myself with. I always thought it was like them, that I wanted to be. Your entry has encouraged me to believe in me more, and to walk forward with grace in the areas that need work. What a beautiful thing you’ve given me! I think you just transformed my life! Yay.

By: Ken

Ken — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 12:40:48 +0000

Maybe. Maybe not.

Warren Buffet is one of the most highly regarded and trusted investors in the world. There’s nothing showy about him.

Carl Sagan was a highly trusted science educator but he was gentle and soft spoken.

When you study actors who’ve had a long and successful career, you often discover that they are generous people too. Tom Hanks, Bill Murray, Meryl Streep, and many others like them get lots of work, not only because they’re talented, but because people in the industry love to work with them.

Actors with similar talents but impossible egos often fade away.

By: Cecilia Bax

Cecilia Bax — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 11:28:17 +0000

As true as this post is…I think I think extroverts still win. They get all the attention and people put their trust in them. I feel that in business people are more willing to put their trust in the chest pounding, ego puffing loudmouthed over confident know it all than the humble guy or woman standing next him or her

By: Helen

Helen — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 07:10:27 +0000

I much prefer this description of confidence. This is what I want for me, in me.

By: gfe--gluten free easily

gfe--gluten free easily — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 17:37:36 +0000

Fantastic post … we all need to reread this one on those days we are not so sure.

Thanks (and thanks to Barbara Winter for tweeting, too).

Shirley