Recently, a friend asked me to share my thoughts on goal setting, but to be quite honest, I don’t have many. I’ve never been successful at it and used to beat myself up about it, but a person can only take so much abuse, so I gave that up.
I’m a lot better at goal shedding. On that, I’m becoming a bit of an expert.
In the beginning, I made a lot of promises on this blog because someone told me it’s a good way to motivate yourself to get things done. Then I failed to keep those promises, so I made a note to myself: stop making promises.
Instead, I keep showing up, which is in keeping with the one and only promise I ever really intended to make, and that’s one I made to myself.
I guess I’m better at picking a direction than I am at selecting a specific destination. I like the idea of being surprised by where I wind up. So far, I’ve wound up here. And I have a book that’s slowly coming together, which is more than I ever had when I was trying to make things happen.
I’m not suggesting you live this way. It might just drive you crazy. At times it drives me crazy too, but ultimately it works for me. The question you have to ask yourself is what works for you.
Are you a goal setter or a goal shedder? Do you need to reach a specific location or are you happy with simply pointing yourself in a general direction and heading that way? Do you have to know the outcome ahead of time or do you enjoy the element of surprise?
There are no right or wrong answers to such questions. Just honest ones. And being honest with yourself is one goal worth aiming for.
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I’d like to say I’m a goal setter. I set ‘em really well. It’s just the goal completion thing that gets me. I, like you just keep showing up. I know there’s a happy medium there for creatives regarding doing the things we want to create a life we want but I’m still working on that
I like this line from the poem, How to See Deer, by Philip Booth.
Expect nothing always, find your luck slowly.
I love this line… “I’m better at picking a direction than I am at selecting a specific destination.”
I think I am, too.
I always enjoy your fresh perspective.
.-= Sandy Dempsey´s last blog ..Book Review:Make the Impossible Possible =-.
I wonder where we’ll wind up.
Ken,
I hope this becomes part of your book. Not everyone is built to set goals and then go out and achieve them. That takes a certain type of personality and to be honest I think it could be the minority of the population. I’m with you. I can set a direction and head out and more than likely achieve more than setting specific goals.
Awesome post!
Thanks,
Mo
There you go again Ken…saying something else that rings true in my heart and head…So funny that I read this today. Because today I heard the most interesting story on an American Public Media program, called “The Story” (http://thestory.org/), that this post brings to mind. On this program people share their strange and interesting personal stories about all sorts of things. Today it was about three guys who had put together a band back in the 60s(the Kansas City Jammers), made an album that had gone nowhere and then went on their separate ways into their more conventional lives. Thirty years later one of them gets a call from someone wanting to buy their album. Pretty soon these albums are being sold on ebay for hundreds of dollars. The three guys think, “Maybe it’s time to get together and give this band thing another shot” And now they are. My point in describing this is what one of they guys said about this whole revival of their band…(speaking only for himself) that it didn’t really matter if they ever really became successful with the revival of their gig. It was simply the pursuit, the process, the journey that he was loving. He was surprised and thrilled to be on this path, having tons of fun, all these many years later.
I’m not sure what my point was but somehow when I started telling this story I saw a relationship between your goal shredding, this guy happily “on the road again” so many years later, and the way I work: “I guess I’m better at picking a direction than I am at selecting a specific destination. I like the idea of being surprised by where I wind up.” That’s me to a “t”
Thanks again for sharing your “Quiet Inspiration”. I love it.
.-= Helen´s last blog ..Going out on a limb…or not =-.
I completely understand. Regardless of what the destination is, the journey is always going to take up 99.9% of your time, so you might as well enjoy it and forget about worrying too much about the destination. Of course, this does not apply to airplane pilots. :O)
You attract many people to your blog who share your philosophy, and in this case your philosoply of not having to pursue every goal they have. Sure, some people who read your blog are type A goal setters who act on every one and achieve most of them. You make the “mildly creative” people feel more comfortable about thinking of ideas and never acting on them. Maybe the reason we don’t complete all the work is that we just come up with more goals than others and there isn’t time in the day to pursue them all. Another point that I think is important is the fact that everything a mildly creative person works on doesn’t have to make them money for them to be happy. Isn’t that the reason for most goals that people make? Not with us. It’s better for us to have fewer goals, like you said. It’s obvious that you took years to come to this conclusion and I thank you for sharing what you’ve learned.
The word “goal” actually makes me nauseous. I’ve never been any good with it when it comes to my art and the business of it. Lately, I’ve been trying to leave the word goal behind.
I much prefer picking a direction and then figuring out what works from there. I keep the things I like, I stop doing the things I hate, and I see where the journey takes me. The only thing that ever happened when I set a goal was that I wouldn’t reach it and I’d just get frustrated. When I leave things alone and just do my thing, suddenly life goes my way.
Read the poem, How to See Deer, by Philip Booth. I quoted a line above, but I believe the entire poem speaks to this very thing.
This is all very interesting. I am the person in the interview Helen speaks of, in the old rock and roll band, and I am impressed how much she related to my experience. In that experience having a goal is very important for me, but it’s a nebulous goal. And achieving that goal, whatever it is, is never, in the end, important. I didn’t used to know that, but experience has taught me. The goal is the “carrot”. In my case, with this band, I have a bunch of goals – thing type goals – fame and fortune probably sums it up.
But here’s the thing – though I strive for fame and fortune, I don’t really expect it and definitely don’t waste energy worrying about it. It is too much fun going through the process of re-forming the band and playing together, and “dreaming”. And truth be told, I am almost certain that if fame came, I would not find that it is what I hoped for. But dang it I’ll keep chasing as long as it is fun. And see what comes. So far, more than I really expected.
So I think goals are useful to supply energy for the train, but they are not the most important thing. I like that notion that even if a goal is achieved, 99% of your time will be spent in the process.
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