“Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them.” Bill Cosby
Rules are seductive little creatures. They’re sneaky too.
They come disguised as promises. “Follow me,” they say, “and I will keep you safe and warm.” They seldom really do.
Instead, they get you in their grip and hold on with all their might. Then they train you to stop thinking.
They are, after all, rules. It’s not in their nature to encourage experimentation or to invite questions. They just want to be followed. And let’s face it, we often invite them in because we secretly like what they’re handing out, a rest from all that damned deciding.
Even if we tire of some and manage to escape them, we can make the mistake of falling for new ones, better ones, more efficient, more effective, more productive, more attractive ones. Thwarting their advances is a constant battle, but it’s a battle worth waging.
Can you think of a single innovation that resulted from a strict adherence to the rules? Have you ever read or even seen a book about great followers?
Your biggest breakthroughs will probably be the result of breaking through the rules you once accepted without question. It’s time to start asking questions.
What rules am I following? Who made these rules? What purpose do they serve? Do they serve my purpose or the purpose of those I’m trying to serve? If not, why on earth am I following them?
These questions and the answers you come up with are important. They’ll enable you to decide if a rule is really helpful or not, and if you decide it’s not, you should feel free to end the relationship. If you really feel bad about doing so, just say, “Sorry baby, it’s not you. It’s me.” Then hit the exit.
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
This post makes very clear to me that I can’t follow my own voice and follow a rule at the same time.
So what will I do in those moments when I’m forced to choose?
Ken, do you have a like a little bubbling brilliance fountain inside that you just go fill a cup from every day?
I know I have high standards, and I’m continually floored.
Tara
.-= Tara Mohr´s last blog ..The Art of Subtraction =-.
No more than you or anyone else does, Tara. The trick is to do something daily, something I’m writing about on the side for an upcoming book. Thanks for your encouragement.
Oh, this was PERFECT for today! Thank you!
Some of my earliest memories are of rules – all for my best interest, of course. And you’re right, Ken . . They were always someone else’s idea of my best interest. I’m guessing that’s true for everyone.
And even though I like to imagine myself a Rule Breaker Extraordinaire, I know I far more frequently have leaned into the rules than stepped over them. (Good thing most of mine have soft edges, and bend.)
There’s something scary outside the rules. What’s REAL is outside the rules. And what’s real tends to be far more complex-squiggly-lined than most rules allow. Then again, nature is all about the beauty of complexity. And even she has rules.
I do have to wonder, though, if it’s really about “rewriting” the rules we have versus finding the “right rules” to replace them. After all, rewriting just creates new rules. What if we don’t have to rewrite anything? What if all we need is already available to us? What if it’s really all about discovering which rules fit us as we’re ever changing in our lives, and simply wrapping those around us till we outgrow them and are ready to move on?
Great post my friend. – g
.-= Gail´s last blog ..Forget About Purpose. What Sparks Your Passion?! =-.